prettyinpink10287's Xanga

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Thu, 01 Feb 2007 00:02:01 GMT

i think i need to get a new xanga site to start totally fresh.... i feel like every time i comeback on this one it just reminds me of before and i become like less inspired or something. so i am going to get a new site. i will update as soon as i do!!

Friday, January 26, 2007

Fri, 26 Jan 2007 03:32:22 GMT

OK so I'm thinking of coming back on here again........ I know I've been gone for a while, but I've been doing so bad lately. I remember last year around this time I did so good, probably because I was on here so much. So I'm back..! I got a new site, but I think I'm just going to use this one again.... Ok so girls I need your help!!! Starting now I am going to LOSE some weight. I need to. I've gained like 15 pounds since the summer time which is just disgusting.

Plan for tomorrow:
No more than 600 calories. I'm going to start off like that and then gradually work it down to nothing. I can't wait to lose a few pounds....I miss that feeling.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Tue, 14 Nov 2006 01:54:01 GMT

i am so hungry right now... i am soo tempted to go upstairs and get something to eat.. someone help me!!!

found this and thought it was really good... --->

give me a reason to be beautiful...

1. You will be FAT if you eat today. just put it off one more day
2. You dont NEED food
3. Fat people cant fit everywhere
4. Guys will be able to pick you up without struggling
5. You'll be able to run faster without all that extra weight holding you back
6. People will remember you as "the beautiful thin one"
7. If someone has to describe you, they'll say "oh she weighs like 100, 110 lbs"
8. Guys will want to get to know you, not laugh at you and walk away
9. Starving is an example of excellent willpower
10. You will be able to see your beautiful, beautiful bones
11. Bones are clean and pure. Fat is dirty and hangs on your bones like a parasite
12. If you eat then you'll look like those disgusting, fat, ghetto and trailer-trash hookers on Jerry Springer
13. The models that everyone claims are beautiful, the spitting image of perfection, are any of them fat? NO
14. Too many people in the world are obese
15. People who eat are selfish and unrealistic
16. Only fat people are attracted to fat people. Do you want pigs to like you because you are one of them
17. Anyone can have "inner beauty" but few can earn real beauty, inside as well as out
18. You'll be able to move as quietly and skillfully as a spider
19. Only thin people are graceful
20. If you slap a fat person you can see a shockwave ripple over their skin. Thats disgusting
21. Do you want people to say "for gods sake get off me youre crushing me!!!" or "you are sooo light"
22. Underweight aka perfect body
23. Ballerina? or beanbag?
24. I want to be light enough so a helium balloon could lift me and carry me to the clouds
25. I want to walk in the snow and leave no footprints
26. Starve off the parts you dont need. Theyre ugly and they drag you down
27. Nothing cant be fixed with hunger and weightloss
28. Saying "no thanks" to food is saying "yes please" to THIN!!!
29. Fat people are so huge, yet people look away from them as if they dont exist
30. The only time people do notice a fat person is when they get in the way of that beautiful thin girl walking by (ok that sounds really horrible i know)
31. Have you ever seen a person NOT notice a walking skeleton
32. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels
33. Is food more important that happiness in life? i think not!
34. Eating is conforming to everyone else's expectations
35. When you start to get dizzy and weak you're almost there
36. Hunger is your friend and it wont betray you like food
37. Food is mean and sneaky. it tricks you into eating it and it works on you from the inside out making you fat, bloated, ugly and unhappy
38. Think of anorexia as your secret weapon
39. If you can name one reason to be fat, ill name a million and one to be thin
40. Thin people look good in ANY kind of clothes

Monday, November 13, 2006

Mon, 13 Nov 2006 03:02:12 GMT

Starting tomorrow I am going to write down everything I eat, or want to eat like I did before. I have been doing kind of poorly lately...
My mom came to visit and she was like "so have you been exericising or anything?" im like "no not that much..." she goes "thats too bad. all that hard work from before and now..." thats when i got really mad. i didnt show it but i was pissed. how embarassing that ive gained weight since i moved. probably like 5-10 pounds. I need to lose weight by the time i go home for christmas. i do not want everyone from highschool to be like wow she definitely gained a few since summer!!! i want to be one of the skinny ones. i want people to see what they missed out on.

i want to feel beautiful. i want to be beautiful.

Reasons to lose weight:

-fit into my jeans
-be noticed
-look good by the time i go home for christmas
-so that i don't have to feel so self conscious every minute of every day
-so that i don't feel like the fattest one at work
-because im worth it
-so that i am finally happy

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Thu, 19 Oct 2006 16:13:45 GMT

So yesterday didn't end up working out exactly as I had wanted it to... i took the girl i nanny for to chipotle for dinner and i ended up getting a vegetarian burrito... i didn't eat all of it, but still i had enough to definitely make a dent in my efforts for the day!! i also had a special k bar and a popsicle at like 1 am.... oh well... today is going well though. i had a small bowl of go lean crunch this morning--150 cal, and i just had a popsicle--50 cal. so only 200 for the day. hopefully i can keep this up!!!

so yesterday i got PAID to get a masssage. this guy is working on becoming a professional masseus and he needed people to give massages to and give him feedback. so i got an 80 minute massage and got paid $60. it was the best thing ever. :)

i need some motivation to work out soo bad. its so sad, the family i live with this year has a stairmaster, bike (its like really oldschool though) and a treadmill. i've been here for 2 months and havent used any of the machines yet. soo pathetic.... well i need to go run errands, i promises to comment lots later. good luck today girls. think of how bad you want this and dont let stupid fat calories ruin your day. hope you are all doing well, xox!

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Wed, 18 Oct 2006 14:00:57 GMT

I am fat.

I weighed myself when I went home this weekend and I have gained 6 pounds.

My pants are tight. I don't feel comfortable wearing anything that is remotely fitted. I feel uncomfortable and self conscious all day long.

I really need help and I really need to lose weight. I can not stand myself being this way. I don't want to leave the house because I don't want people to see me. (I also have like nothing flattering to wear anymore.)

I really need help and I really need to plan out a diet that works. Someone please help me or give me some advice!!! :(:(

TODAYS PLAN:

***neg cal fast*** i will only eat fruit, veggies and tea. i know i can do this!!! this morning i had a small small bowl of fiber 1 but i am doing the neg cal fast from then on.

***the family i nanny for is SOO CLUTTERED and their house is such a mess. it could be soo pretty. so i am going to start organizing everything today. this will keep me busy and hopefully burn off many cals!!***

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Tue, 10 Oct 2006 10:30:01 GMT

The principle is competing against yourself.

It's about self-improvement, about being

better than you were the day before.

I've been working a lot lately so I've been able to somewhat avoid food and unnecessary boredom binges. My biggest problem is at nighttime. I'm going home in a couple days and I really don't want everyone to think I gained weight. I know I have gained a few pounds since I moved out here a couple months ago. Its definitely noticeable too. So I have 3 full days before I go back. I need to do really well. I think I am going to try and fast today. I haven't fasted in over a month. :-/

"Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, this time more wisely."

"The day you take complete responsibility for yourself, the day you stop making any excuses, thats the day you start to the top."

Words to lose by:

A binge is like a banquet in a graveyard. (When you're tempted to overeat, remind yourself that you are slowly killing yourself. Put that fork down!)

Get great at the wait. (Be patient--the ability to persevere is what seperates whiners from WINNERS, especially in weight loss)

Nothing tastes as good as thin feels. (Thin feels better than gooey chocolate and marshmallow in my mouth. Thin feels better than my tongue under a blanket of fried pork chops smothered in gravy.)

A U-turn beats a NO turn. (It's never too late to stop a binge: 6 oreos are better than 6 oreos and a piece of pie!)

Think: What would I be feeling is I weren't eating? What will I feel once I am done eating?

Front-load to prevent buttload. (If you are going to eat, consume most of your calories toward the front of the day. That usually means that you will be carrying a lot less junk in your trunk (haha) because just from daily activity, you will burn most of it off!)

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Thu, 28 Sep 2006 10:31:42 GMT

i am going to try and just eat a minimal healthy diet. it seems like i either starve myself and go crazy, or biinge until i want to like die. i think im going to try and do something in between.... which is really hard because i always want to go back and forth between the two extremes. so far today i've had a cup of mega antioxidant juice and a cup of tea. only calories was in the juice, but hey its good for you so i dont care. i need to bring talia to school. i'll update later. gotta love being a nanny....

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Sun, 24 Sep 2006 17:39:12 GMT

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i did pretty well this weekend if you don't count the drinks i had last night...cocktails have so many calories... atleast i only had 3 though, which was just the right amount. and they were all free because simone bought them all. haha i love how guys always are like forced to buy you drinks/food if they are kind of 'seeing' you. i don't know what to do about this guy though. i really like him but he's like 5 years older than i am and a lot more experienced.. kind of makes me nervous. he slept over again last night and this morning wanted to go out for waffles and stuff--luckily i convinced him we should just go to starbucks instead. i got an iced chai. probably not the best choice but a girls gotta splurge sometimes right? god i feel like such a bad person. ever since i moved out here i've like ignored my moral upbringing...
well this post is pretty stupid so im going to end it now. i promise to come back on later and comment.

XOXOX

stay strong&&healthy today girls, don't eat extra calories. no binging!!!

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Friday, September 22, 2006

Fri, 22 Sep 2006 13:23:11 GMT

i haven't updated in so long... i think its because i'm so unmotivated and i have just stopped caring a little bit/given up. which is very bad. i have definitely gained weight and i feel gross. it sucks. i just feel heavy and sluggish. probably the worst feeling ever. this guy that i'm sort of together with is coming up from nyc today too, i wish i felt better about myself, i'd be a lot more excited to see him then. i'm going to force myself to go to the gym. i spent like $150 becoming a member and paying for the first month membership at this place called Vida Fitness and so far i've only gone there once.... i've been a member for like 3 weeks too. this is just pathetic!!! someone help me!!!! ahhh
intake today:
3 bites zone bar: 90 cal
fiber 1 cereal + soy milk: 100 cal
coffee w/ creamer: 20 cal
total: 210.

knowing me it will be like 21,000,000 by the end of the day........ im going to make sure that doesnt happen though.... i really need to get back on track. someone please help me!!!

i miss you girls.