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| i think i need to get a new xanga site to start totally fresh.... i feel like every time i comeback on this one it just reminds me of before and i become like less inspired or something. so i am going to get a new site. i will update as soon as i do!! | | |
| i am so hungry right now... i am soo tempted to go upstairs and get something to eat.. someone help me!!!
found this and thought it was really good... --->
give me a reason to be beautiful...
1. You will be FAT if you eat today. just put it off one more day
2. You dont NEED food
3. Fat people cant fit everywhere
4. Guys will be able to pick you up without struggling
5. You'll be able to run faster without all that extra weight holding you back
6. People will remember you as "the beautiful thin one"
7. If someone has to describe you, they'll say "oh she weighs like 100, 110 lbs"
8. Guys will want to get to know you, not laugh at you and walk away
9. Starving is an example of excellent willpower
10. You will be able to see your beautiful, beautiful bones
11. Bones are clean and pure. Fat is dirty and hangs on your bones like a parasite
12. If you eat then you'll look like those disgusting, fat, ghetto and trailer-trash hookers on Jerry Springer
13. The models that everyone claims are beautiful, the spitting image of perfection, are any of them fat? NO
14. Too many people in the world are obese
15. People who eat are selfish and unrealistic
16. Only fat people are attracted to fat people. Do you want pigs to like you because you are one of them
17. Anyone can have "inner beauty" but few can earn real beauty, inside as well as out
18. You'll be able to move as quietly and skillfully as a spider
19. Only thin people are graceful
20. If you slap a fat person you can see a shockwave ripple over their skin. Thats disgusting
21. Do you want people to say "for gods sake get off me youre crushing me!!!" or "you are sooo light"
22. Underweight aka perfect body
23. Ballerina? or beanbag?
24. I want to be light enough so a helium balloon could lift me and carry me to the clouds
25. I want to walk in the snow and leave no footprints
26. Starve off the parts you dont need. Theyre ugly and they drag you down
27. Nothing cant be fixed with hunger and weightloss
28. Saying "no thanks" to food is saying "yes please" to THIN!!!
29. Fat people are so huge, yet people look away from them as if they dont exist
30. The only time people do notice a fat person is when they get in the way of that beautiful thin girl walking by (ok that sounds really horrible i know)
31. Have you ever seen a person NOT notice a walking skeleton
32. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels
33. Is food more important that happiness in life? i think not!
34. Eating is conforming to everyone else's expectations
35. When you start to get dizzy and weak you're almost there
36. Hunger is your friend and it wont betray you like food
37. Food is mean and sneaky. it tricks you into eating it and it works on you from the inside out making you fat, bloated, ugly and unhappy
38. Think of anorexia as your secret weapon
39. If you can name one reason to be fat, ill name a million and one to be thin
40. Thin people look good in ANY kind of clothes | | |
| Starting tomorrow I am going to write down everything I eat, or want to eat like I did before. I have been doing kind of poorly lately...
My mom came to visit and she was like "so have you been exericising or anything?" im like "no not that much..." she goes "thats too bad. all that hard work from before and now..." thats when i got really mad. i didnt show it but i was pissed. how embarassing that ive gained weight since i moved. probably like 5-10 pounds. I need to lose weight by the time i go home for christmas. i do not want everyone from highschool to be like wow she definitely gained a few since summer!!! i want to be one of the skinny ones. i want people to see what they missed out on.
i want to feel beautiful. i want to be beautiful.
Reasons to lose weight:
-fit into my jeans
-be noticed
-look good by the time i go home for christmas
-so that i don't have to feel so self conscious every minute of every day
-so that i don't feel like the fattest one at work
-because im worth it
-so that i am finally happy
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| So yesterday didn't end up working out exactly as I had wanted it to... i took the girl i nanny for to chipotle for dinner and i ended up getting a vegetarian burrito... i didn't eat all of it, but still i had enough to definitely make a dent in my efforts for the day!! i also had a special k bar and a popsicle at like 1 am.... oh well... today is going well though. i had a small bowl of go lean crunch this morning--150 cal, and i just had a popsicle--50 cal. so only 200 for the day. hopefully i can keep this up!!!
so yesterday i got PAID to get a masssage. this guy is working on becoming a professional masseus and he needed people to give massages to and give him feedback. so i got an 80 minute massage and got paid $60. it was the best thing ever. :)
i need some motivation to work out soo bad. its so sad, the family i live with this year has a stairmaster, bike (its like really oldschool though) and a treadmill. i've been here for 2 months and havent used any of the machines yet. soo pathetic.... well i need to go run errands, i promises to comment lots later. good luck today girls. think of how bad you want this and dont let stupid fat calories ruin your day. hope you are all doing well, xox! | | |
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